The Guided Tour Of The South Coast Tour Pt. 1

We’re now 3 days into the Guided Tour Of The South Coast Tour and I’m sure my loyal fans are clamouring for some sweet deets.

In a slightly bizarre scheduling decision our tour of south England kicked off in Preston, undoubtedly a great venue in a top uni town but the only way we could’ve been further form the south coast is if we’d just remained at home. Non the less Preston really knows how to show a guy a good time.

We played in Vinyl Tap, a bar/restaurant/venue that has a great take on the vinyl revival, the amazing record collection it holds is not for sale, instead you pick the album you want to hear and the bar staff will play it in full. A great, novel idea that gives a special, inclusive atmosphere. Part of the fun is owner Sean and his amazing hat, a classic cowboy Stetson, definitely from Yosemite, possibly from Clint himself. Having performed the traditional hat appreciation dance with Andy we proceeded to discuss the many virtues of Bruce Springsteen’s The River for up to half an hour before our set.

The gig was our first chance to work some new tracks into the set which is always exciting and in this case also well received, which is a nice bonus. We also bore witness to the talents of UCLAN’s 3x intramural Rodeo champion, who used the breakdown of Walda to display the proper technique when breaking in a firey mustang before disappearing enigmatically into the night.

Our next stop was to the famous Cavern, Raynes Park to play for Noel and his gang of Merry Men. This is a gig that has come to be one of our favourites, Noel’s pub is a real throw back to the times when music pubs were packed every night and showcased some of the best up coming bands in town. Unfortunately this did require a through the night drive from Preston straight to Wimbledon, with departure at 1am and arrival at a mind bending 8am. Huge props to our driver and sound guy Jason for pulling off this feat of human perseverance and still being able to put up with Andy’s shit craic during sound check. The Cavern is always a top night and huge thanks again to Sue and her amazing jugs, which she once again hassled the poor patrons to fill with cash (nothing but notes she’s not trying to make a phone call…)

Next we were off to the very cool Balabam, Tottenham. The venue is relatively new but has already garnered a reputation for great nights of music and it’s easy to see why, the atmosphere is relaxed and inviting, the staff are very easy going and the beer is shit hot, I’d recommend anyone who has a chance to catch a gig there to head down.

First thing was the matinee showing of Tom’s debut porno, written and directed by Jonny Foster. Thanks to everyone who made it down, we had not anticipated such rapturous acclaim.

pre-gig we had our first experience of Ethiopian food, which was delicious and generally well received but was a bit hot for poor Zack’s sensitive little mouth, who, having gone white as a sheet from the first mouthful, proceeded to eat in stoic silence, glistening with sweat and with a slight tremor in his hands. Maybe stick to the kormas next time kiddo.

This fuelled us up nicely for the two sets we played that night. The new songs continue to grow as we play them in and are now fitting nicely into the set, after three successful shows we’re feeling confident and ready to take on anyone. Also great to see some friendly faces, the lovely Paul of Dead Writers fame, our good pal and Carlisle lad Ronan McManus (who you’ll hopefully be able to catch at The Source in the not too distant future, something which I heartily encourage you to do) and producer/promoter/engineer/all round top bloke Russ.

And finally the McDonalds intake leaderboard currently sits thusly:

In third place with a respectable 2 meals in 3 days, it’s the man in the middle, J Dog Foster;

Sitting in a surprise second place with 3 meals in 3 days, a potential dark horse for the title? It’s Zack McDaddy;

And tearing away into what must surely be approaching an insurmountable lead, with a nauseating 6 Maccy meals in 3 days, the man with the iron stomach, you knew it from the beginning.

Jason motherfucking Randall.


Let everyday be mother’s day and pogue mahone, HC. X

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